Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Happy Halloween Bitches

LilPip108, originally uploaded by mylilpip.

The picture is from Halloween 1997. I was staying in a hotel in Ottawa, ON and visiting my French-Canadian boyfriend, Patric. I did his costume and mine. He was The Scarecrow from The Wizard of Oz. I was Torn-up Orphan Annie.

I don't have a costume this year. So, I decided to "costume" my post instead. I will write my post in the style of another blogger. So, for Halloween 2006, I am Rosie O'Donnell.

uptempo is a very bad blogger.
inconsistent and elusive for several months.
uptempo may go offline soon.
im still not sure.

looking West
lots of fear
little amounts of cash
lots of moral support

im addicted to heroes
when did i become this geek

watching oprah right now
cause im unemployed

denzel is one great actor
but O's energy is odd as
america's greatest black female star
greets america's greatest black male star

Saturday, October 21, 2006

For the Record
My best friend, Patchy, wants me to stop saying that I was fired from my television job. I wasn't really fired. Because I only free lanced there. The station refused to meet my terms and when i called them on it they decided to go forward with someone else. It still sucks to start a project and then be told that we don't think you are worth paying for which is the same thing as being fired in my book. I'll explain more about this later.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

The Tragedy of October 16th
Grab a sack lunch kids 'cause this post is a longer one.

Miss American Pie is one of Steve's best friends. She is having a really tough year.

Her father passed away earlier this year. It is difficult to lose a parent. Well, imagine losing two in the same year. Miss American Pie's mother is in hospice right now. She has been traveling regularly to Milwaukee to help her mother die. Now, it is no secret that I am not a huge fan of Miss American Pie but I wish her no harm either. And we both extended a hand to help. When her father died, Steve and I volunteered to keep her dog Roxy for her. Roxy gets along with Steve's dogs very well. They have been play pals for years. We extended the same courtesy for her while she deals with her mother.

On Sunday, Miss American Pie brought Roxy over around 1 or 2 pm. I was busy doing some re-writes on the children's television show I've been working on for the last 6 weeks. Steve was doing some fall house chores. We both stopped our projects so that we could find out if she was doing okay and the status of her mother. Things were not good. In addition to her mother's health, her daughter just dropped out of college this semester for health reasons. And Miss American Pie told us that Roxy was not doing well either. Roxy wasn't eating and she had become very lethargic. It must be the stress we all said.

When I fed the dogs dinner Sunday night, Steve's dogs lapped up their dinner very quickly but Roxy ate 2 or 3 pieces of kibble and then she was finished. I also noticed that Roxy was breathing funny. Her breathing was very labored. Maybe this wasn't just stress. On expert advice, Steve and I decided to take Roxy to a vet the next morning to make sure.

Originally, Steve was going to take Roxy to the vet located in Lakeview but I had a pre-production meeting in Lincoln Park so it seemed easier for me to do. It was a very typical October in Chicago kind of day. Heavily overcast, slightly windy, with sprinkles of rain intermittently. Roxy immediately started to pull at her leash when she and I arrived at the animal hospital. She did not want to go inside. I pulled at her leash and talked real pretty to her and she went inside.

Our doctor was mild mannered and cute. Roxy responded well to him except when he wanted to examine her mouth and her abdomen. His initial examination was not enough. He asked if he could run some tests. I called Steve and Miss American Pie to let them know what was going on. We all decided to let the doctor do his thing. I left Roxy in cute and capable hands while I went off to my Lincoln Park meeting.

My meeting was to get some feedback from an award winning teacher on our show. My boss, who I call "the fountain" because she just bubble thoughts and ideas in every direction,wanted to know if third graders would find it entertaining. Needless to say, my mind was on Roxy (actually I was feeling really bad for Miss American Pie) and it was difficult to focus. We got through about half of the scenes and then my cell phone started to vibrate. It was the cutey vet and he didn't have good news. Roxy had cancer. It was very advanced and the prognosis was not good. The doctor asked me to come back so he could show me the x-rays and talk to me about our extremely limited options. I still had a least another hour in this meeting. I finished the meeting and headed back to the animal hospital.

I arrived at the animal hospital at 1 pm. It was closed until 1:30 pm. I went to pick some food up at Eatzi's rather than hang outside on one of the gloomiest days ever. The attendant unlocked the doors promptly at 1:30 but the doctor was out until 2 pm. I waited reading the New Yorker to pass the time. When I was called into the vet's office I hesitated the same way Roxy did when arrived. I knew it would not end well.

With Miss American Pie's permission, I signed the paper work to euthanize Roxy. It saddened me. It still does.

Of course, this is only half of the great tragedy of Monday the 16th. In a future post, I'll tell you how I was fired from my brand new television job later that evening.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Gay Day
It is National Coming Out Day. My friends keep sending me messages that I should tell somebody about my sexuality. OK. Is there anyone left that doesn't know? Guess what world, Pip Lilly is a major faggot...signed Pip Lilly. Yes, I used the word faggot. I love it. I came out over 15 years ago now and that word doesn't hurt at all. I am a fag. I am a dance diva lovin', Project Runway watchin', man sex havin' fag. And I defy anyone to make me feel bad it about it. I love my life as an out gay male. And if you are gay, lesbian, or bi (like my gal LL Cool P) celebrate don't commiserate.

If you are really feeling gay, I suggest you listen to one of my favorite fag podcasts, Gay Pimpin' with Johnny McGovern (It's Fahhhhhhhhhhhhhbulous).

Friday, October 06, 2006

Appearing Tonight

new_cp_main, originally uploaded by Uptempo Orpheus.

All of you Chicagoans (and some of you satellite babies) can catch me this weekend as a guest on the PBS station WTTW-11 where I will appear on Check Please!

The episode was fun to tape. Alpana Singh is even lovelier in person than she appears on the telly. She is not only beautiful but she is extremely knowledgable and a warm friendly person.

Check Please! can be seen on WTTW-Channel 11.
Friday at 8pm
Saturday at 11:30 pm
Sunday at 10:30 pm

What Is Wrong with US?
Human beings, why are we so fucked up? And why are our politicians focused on congressman Mark Foley being gay more than the fact that he acted inappropriately as an adult and a leader? And it seems that his own party is really off base on the subject. Their brilliant spin control idea? Attack the gays. Ben Stein recently wrote an article for The American Spectator where he broadly (not nearly a strong enough word) paints a picture of democrats and gays. He says:
We have a Republican man in Congress who sent e-mails to teenage boys asking them what they were wearing, and an entire party, the Democrats, whose primary constituency, besides the teachers' unions, is homosexual men and lesbian women. I hope it won't come as a surprise to anyone that a big part of male homosexual behavior is interest in young boys. (Take a look at anyone renting Endless Summer next time you are at the video store.)
I'll remember that Ben when I see straight men renting Lolita, Great Balls of Fire, and anything starring Lindsay Lohan or Hillary Duff. Conservative Linda Harvey also took time out to show her bigotry. And of course, our country's most openly bigoted son Pat Robertson along with Paul Weyrich let the world know that Foley's behavior is "typical of gay men." What is wrong with you fuckin' idiots? Stop trying to win some political edge over gays and democrats and deal with why a man in his position is doing what he is doing. Deal with the men (gay and straight) amongst your ranks that are abusing their positions of power to court sweet young ass instead of living the squeaky clean lives that they want to legislate that we live.

Of course, our country doesn't hold the patent on stupid political fights.

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Only Kidding
In the "are you serious?" category comes the story of a gay school superintendent in Tinly Park, IL. It seems he tried to put together a humorous mockumentary video of his teachers and staff and now they want to use his joke to fire him. People, get a fucking sense of humor.